Let yourself in!!

22 01 2013

   Always fascinates me the way people seems to interfere in others lives as if they trying to convert you to put you in the righteous path of their so called right way to live because from what i have experienced being different is like a disability it’s like you have an odd chemical reaction that can never lead to the right formula.

Somehow saying no when you supposed to say yes is very very strange to some people that can make them reach for your help to find out what’s wrong with your mind.and the thing is our parents and everyone we practically know urge us to be different to have a mind of our own to think for ourselves to build our own future , no plan no map just a free well and open mind and yet we get judged for being different?! i’m not saying that we should espousal some weird ideas or joining a cult  i’m talking about the normal differences like preferring the dark colors over Pink or Kingdom Of Heaven over The Note Book.

Here’s the thing, There isn’t actually a rule book to tell us how to feel , What to feel , What to love or how we choose to love it , and definitely Not a conflict of civilizations the problem is (if it’s even a problem) acceptance , because i believe everyone out there wants to be accepted as he is not as he told. the thing with me that pisses everyone’s off is that i know i’m not what i’m always told i should be and i’m not looking for acceptance and definitely not an understanding i’m the type of person who enjoys being different seeking the unusual methods of how to be like no other even if it means making a stupid mistakes even after then i’ll wear them proudly because they’re my mistakes not someone else’s my bad choices and trust me it’s not that easy either.

the point is i don’t compromise when it comes to who i am ,i don’t see fifty shades of gray ,i don’t need to be saved or deliverance and there’s a big chance here that i have no possible idea of what i want but here’s what i don’t want , i don’t want to live my life through someone’s eye!! i rather being myself and loosing everyone than loosing myself.



17 01 2013


16 01 2013


I have written another dark poem, since I seem to be unable to write about more pleasant topics, such as daffodils, love or other such more readable matter. However, I can’t think of a name for this poem, and I would (if you please!) like it if anyone could think of a suitable title. Please comment with possible titles. Thanks! Gertie xxx

Down the cold winding paths
that lead to his death,
to the cruel sharp knife
that will cease his breath.

He looks for his lover,
but no girl can he see.
Only lurking figures
looming behind trees.

‘Let’s meet by the cherry tree’
she’d said with a smile.
The flash of teeth
that made him blush for a while.

With each hesitant step
he remembers her face,
flawless, perfect, beautiful.
He thinks of the embrace.

How easily he’d walked
into her beckoning arms,
blinded by her beauty-
he saw no harm.

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Today’s Resolutions!

16 01 2013



  Since the year’s already started and every one seems to have their priority straightened! Me on the other hand don’t have any! not really!! … 

For a while now all the Resolutions i once made was to be Happy first and second and Third but then 2013 Came and the Mayan were wrong obviously (No offence) and i lived to say another day so i thought maybe this is the time to finally think of some decent positive thoughts to start the year with! So, here i am siting in front of my computer staring at the screen while my fingers floating on the keyboard like a slight wind on winter day!

01. I Decided to be healthy Way too late i know which is stupid to take long to realize that i have been raised and grew up in unhealthy environment and spent too much of my life fighting the voice or reason which is another meaningless excuse leading me to the next resolution.

02. No more teen drama i’m a big girl now and no one likes immature sassy girls not even me.

03. Live, laugh, and exercise (Not exactly what i was welling to write but i’m on a special Diet. Sorry about that 🙂 )

04. Drop the pies weight i think i can do Supernatural Wednesdays without eating pies (I swear i can hear Dean yelling Sonofbitch right now :p) , the first goal is to reach 60 kg which is only about 5 weeks away (fingers crossed)!

05. Spend more time outdoors than indoors (I need a tan anyway 😉 🙂 )

06. Read more ,whatever comes my way.

07. Stop making excuses to keep my life on a pause ,life isn’t going to wait for me (i was being deep sue me!).

But seriously i was spending all my time in my head (The wanted aren’t wrong about that song) afraid that i might not like what i ‘ll find but people can change i know i have! and looking back to where i have been and all what the time i spent to change it , makes it so hard to go back just because i’m having a nostalgia!! And now instead of spending all the time in Shorouk’s world how about Sophie’s world by Jostein Gaarder. Sounds like a plan right!

16 01 2013

16 01 2013

A Wordless Blogger

DAY 28. – Favorite quote from a book.

30 day book challenge

“Laugh whenever you can. Keeps you from killing yourself when things are bad. That and vodka.”
― Jim ButcherChanges

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16 01 2013

Fusteratedreader's Blog

I know that I’ve talked before how language is going to crap and how I wish we’d go back 100-200 years ago when language was an art form. Let’s face it here, language has changed a lot in the past century. I could do a whole post on the common misspellings on the internet. If you really want that, I’m going to point you to Blimey Cow. I love them. Totally says what I think.

What I really want though, other than wanting language to go back to being elegant and a tool other than just a sad form of communication, is letter writing. Like hand-written, I took time for you to write down my thoughts, letter. When I’m hand writing something, a grant, a thank you card, something of that sorts, I think of what I’m going to say. I swear it makes me sound smarter.

Take Pride…

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